DNF Review for Leah on the Offbeat

DNF Review for Leah on the Offbeat

Dropped at page 78. One of my MOST anticipated reads this year. This gif here shows me going into the book all fangirly, excited, and OMG I JUST NEED TO READ IT. And it shows how quickly it all turned to RAGGGGEEEEEEEE. And disappointment.

Becky Albertalli quickly became my favourite writer after Simon Vs, I then had the chance to meet her and I became an even bigger fan of her. So imagine my delight when I heard about this book, that this one would be a sequel to Simon Vs. Not with Simon (sadly), but with Leah. I was very eager to get to read this book, but it took me a bit longer to start it, I was just too worried I would hate it. Now I guess I could just have read it whenever I wanted.

From the start though I noticed that Leah was just a bitch. The first sentence along made me go like: Whut girl? “I don’t mean to be dramatic, but God save me from Morgan picking our set list. That girl is a suburban dad’s midlife crisis in a high school senior body.” Who the actual hell says that about their friends?  Or later on. “Translation of the translation: Leah Catherine Burke is an actual genius, and we should never ever doubt her music taste.” Or this classic line: “Welp. I guess I should have shut up about Journey. Like, I get it. I am white. I’m supposed to love shitty classic rock.” And then there is this sentence just a page later: “I’m basically your resident fat Slytherin Rory Gilmore.” Um, whut?

But that is not the first we see of Leah and making weird remarks. She is an utter bitch towards anyone and everyone. Well, OK, maybe not towards Simon or his boyfriend Bram. Leah LURRRVVESSS Simon and would marry him if he wasn’t gay (and taken). She calls him sweet baby gay (whut?), and she is constantly gushing about the guy. I get that she has/had a crush, but really, um, this just felt so awkward.

But Leah went from terrible to worse when she kept acting like a total 5-year old towards her mom. Your mom finally found a good dude after 7 FUCKING years, and all you do, as an 18-year old (as I am guessing she must be around that age) is whine, complain, be a fucking bitch towards him, not giving him one chance. I get that it is probably hard for you to understand, but your mom is allowed to date, your mom is allowed to find a new hubby, your mom is allowed to do that as she has her life, and you have yours. Just talk to her honestly and tell her how you feel instead of constantly bitching and whining.

Garrett, poor poor Garrett. I just wanted to hug him, tell him he should stop going after Leah as she has NO interest in him, she is just being an absolute bitch. Yep, I felt so sorry for Garrett. Leah clearly knows he has an interest in her, even to the point of that he likes her a lot, and instead of just clearing up the air and telling him that no, she doesn’t want to date him. She leads him on, acts totally weird around him, and then to make matters worse, when asked on a date to a game (I would call it a date), she just doesn’t go because she doesn’t feel like it. Because she had a shitty day. Because whatever Leah-ness came between. And yes, she just doesn’t go. She doesn’t cancel, she doesn’t answer anything, and then later she even LIES ABOUT IT towards the dude. Girllll, shitty ass attitude?

And funny enough, she blames him for stuff. Like this classic sentence: “I can’t go to the game. Not feeling the way I feel right now. I can’t deal with Garrett and his try-hard, dudebro act. Like, we all know you’re secretly a dreamy-eyed piano kid, so stop pretending to be a douchebag. And stop messing with my head. Either flirt with me or don’t. Either be cute or not.” Which is a funny one, as throughout the book I haven’t seen Garrett act one time like a douchebag or a hard dude-bro (whatever that may be, but it sounds terrible). And yes, he is flirting with you, all the time, but he is probably also unsure about things, as boys are. Girls aren’t the only ones who feel unsure about starting something, boys also have feelings. 😐

Then there was the whole Morgan didn’t get accepted to x college that Leah will go to, so please Leah, don’t talk to Morgan. What? Why? What kind of friendship do these girls have? It sounds quite unhealthy to me. I get that Morgan is probably hurt, but still to just act like this towards Leah? No thank you. For this one rare time, I was in team Leah.

And then there was that awkward racist conversation that really came out of nowhere and quite destroyed the character of Morgan.

Also Nick and Abby? Suddenly their perfect relationship is starting to grow cracks and even on the verge of breaking up. What the hell?

Oh and since we are on the topic of Retsuko, Leah did remind me of Tsunoda.

So, I am terribly sorry, but I hated this. This was terrible. Leah was horrendous, she keeps complaining, judging, making mean comments, and she is just urggghhhhhhhh. This book made me rage (just like Retsuko), but also very sad. This is my first BA book that I didn’t like, correction, that I hated. 🙁 I do hope her next book will be better again, can we just have another book about Simon?


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