I see a square-jawed woman with shoulder-length blonde hair in waves and cool blue eyes. I know she wants to reach out to me, but my rejection is stopping her. I realize with shock that Mama is actually starting to be afraid of me. The loving, laughing girl she brought up for twelve years is becoming a stranger. And there’s nothing I can do to stop this now. It’s as if I need to disconnect in order to prepare for my new life.