I decided to pick today’s date to select the page number. Today is 21-9, so page 219 it is!
Pia stepped forward and handed Alisha a pair of flamenco pants. ‘It’s a Spanish theme tonight,’ she said. ‘These are for you.’
‘Thanks,’ said Alisha and, seeing the way Pia and Flo were wearing theirs, she immediately put her pair on her head.
I flipped through the book 3 times and stopped at page 125.
All variety of pants-pissing thoughts descended on me as I stared up at the fortress of trees marking the entrance to the forest. I remembered that we had no idea just how big the island was. It could be absolutely swarming with the undead or it could be some kind of killer bear sanctuary.
Carl’s knife was big but it wasn’t that big. There was a a bitter innuendo in there somewhere, but I was just too damn frightened to consider it.
I hang up and watch the vlog. I see a very upset and clearly emotional me saying things I really mean but I do sound a bit like a teacher. I’m also so involved in what I’m saying that I completely fail to notice Dave, who has slinked up behind me and spotted Grandad’s wading bird calendar lying on the bench.
Dave doesn’t like birds. And she really doesn’t like ringed plovers. Even paper ones.
When she spots the ringed plover, Dave decides to lift herself up on two legs and dance hypnotically from side to side. She’s better that the “Thriller” cat and looks like she’s been trained by the world’s best choreographers. She then starts diving up and down on top of the plover, licking, head-butting it and twizzling her bum on it.